What do you call a cow with no legs?
Ground beef!
What do you call cattle with a sense of humor?
Laughing stock.
Why did the blonde buy a brown cow?
To get chocolate milk.
What are a cows favorite subjects in school?
Moosic, psycowolgy, cowculus.
What do you get when you cross a cow and a goat?
A coat!
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bull-dozer!
What do you call a grumpy cow?
Moo-dy!
What do you get when you cross a cow and a duck?
Milk and Quackers!
What do you call it when a cow jumps over a barbed wire fence?
Udder-Catastrophe.
Where do you find the most cows?
Moo-York.
What do you call a cow that plays a musical instrument?
A Moo-sician!
What do cows get when they are sick?
Hay Fever.
Why does a milking stool have only three legs?
Because the cow has the udder.
What did the farmer call the cow that had no milk?
An udder failure!
What do you get if you cross a chicken with a cow?
Roost beef!
What happened to the lost cattle?
Nobody's herd!
What do cows get when they do all their chores?
Mooney.
What did one dairy cow say to another?
Got milk?
How to you know that cows will be in heaven?
It's a place of udder delight.
When is a farmer like a magician?
When he turns his cow into pasture.
Why is a barn so noisy?
All the cows have horns.
Why can't the bankrupt cowboy complain?
He's got no beef.
What animals do you bring to bed?
Your calves.
Why can't you shock cows?
They've herd it all!
Have you heard about the cow astronaut?
He landed on the moooon!
Why do cows wear bells?
Their horns don't work.
What are the spots on black and white cows?
Holstains.
What kind of milk comes from a forgetful cow?
Milk of Amnesia.
Have you ever heard the term "When Pigs Fly!"......
Well what if it were "When Cows Fly!"
Where do cows go when they want a night out?
To the moo-vies!
What do you call a cow with a twitch?
Beef Jerky.
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